The Stone on Top of the Stack

The stone on top of the stack isn’t the biggest one. Nor is it necessarily the most beautiful. In fact, it’s there because of the bigger ones supporting it underneath. Likewise, a higher position doesn’t equal a superior person.

Human nature and every culture think it does. We assume that just because someone has risen in the ranks of whatever organization, corporation, or group they’re in, it must mean they’re better. Expressions such as “Cream rises to the top” serve to reinforce this impression.

Let’s examine this further:

First, ask “how did they get there?” (to that high position). If they used unscrupulous means, they’re actually worse, when it comes to character! And there’s no evidence of anything better than us. If it was by “luck” or however we interpret things that seem to have no reason behind them, then it’s nothing of their own doing, and therefore doesn’t qualify them as “better”. If someone helped them, give credit to the helper, not the recipient.

If they got there by having the right and relevant skills, that only means they’re better at something, not inherently better. They discovered and made the most and best of their natural talents, abilities, and acquired skills. That makes them someone to learn from. If they have good character as well, that makes them great role models and mentors. Plus, it shows good judgment on the part of whoever promoted them. But again, they weren’t created better.

Second, how do we define value? By what we do? By what we’ve accomplished? By how often we win? By how big a fish we are in how big a pond? If that’s the case, we’re all in trouble, because there will always be bigger fish and bigger ponds, someone who does more, gets more accolades, wins more, etc. And what happens when we can no longer accomplish or win anything, when we “shrink” as it were?

Or when someone’s situation and/or circumstances change? Every senior in high school that goes to college becomes a lowly freshman again, even the class president! Even execs can find themselves unemployed if their company fails or the economy goes bust. Does that make the now-freshman or now-unemployed suddenly inferior?

If our value and worth come from our position, we’re all in trouble. If they come from the reality that “all [people] are created equal”, then we’re safe, because we’ll never lose that. Those in lower positions need never feel their time, talents, treasures, or personhood matter less. Those in higher positions can stay humble and stress less over keeping up appearances or losing their value if they lose their position.

Yes, aspire to be and do great things. Aspire to leadership—for greater service, not because it makes us superior to others. You may be the stone on top of the stack, but you got there by the support of bigger rocks!

It helps to remember this when we think about talking to those in high positions of leadership, and/or when we enter their presence. Recently a coaching client and I were talking about her anxiety about messaging or meeting with senior leaders.  She was preparing for an upcoming 30-minute meeting with one, and told me, “I’m afraid I might waste their time. Their time is so valuable!”

“I get that, not wanting to waste anyone’s time”, I affirmed. “I don’t want to waste anyone’s time either. Do you consider your own time valuable?”

“Yeah, but…” As we talked more, it became clear that she considered higher-level people’s time more valuable than hers because they themselves had more value due to their position.

We examined the validity of that concept, and I helped her see that everyone’s time is valuable because everyone is valuable. So, while not wanting to waste someone’s time is very considerate and kind, that applies to everyone we meet with, not just high-up leaders. At the same time, it also takes the pressure off and anxiety away when we meet with them, knowing we meet as equals in terms of value, and each has something to offer the other.

After all, (as I told my client), “We all put our trousers on one leg at a time”. Even those of us who wear designer clothing!

James 1:9-11 gives us perspective: “Believers in humble circumstances ought to take pride in their high position.But the rich should take pride in their humiliation—since they will pass away like a wildflower. For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls, and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich will fade away even while they go about their business.”

What if we are one of those in a high position of leadership? A humble mindset, recognizing we all have equal value and importance, helps us lead well and gain true respect from our followers. It also informs us how to treat others.

“My brothers and sisters, believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ must not show favoritism. Suppose a man comes into your meeting wearing a gold ring and fine clothes, and a poor man in filthy old clothes also comes in. If you show special attention to the man wearing fine clothes and say, ‘Here’s a good seat for you,’ but say to the poor man, ‘You stand there’ or ‘Sit on the floor by my feet,’ have you not discriminated among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?” James 2:1-4

That kind of favoritism and discrimination occur when we assume that “higher is better”.

But each of us are made in the image of God (Gen. 1:27). Regardless of our position or the clothes that come with it, we’re His Designer product. Regardless of our shape, size, or position in the stack!